art, experiences, idioms, life

Doing to have something to do… (or how I avoid desperation)

Three months ago my contract at the NGO where I worked ended. I still haven’t found a new job. Being without a permanent job is a very challenging situation because I live with a constant feeling of instability.

I’ve never been good at dealing with “having nothing to do”. These moments always bring out the worst of me. Inactivity generates uncertainty. Doubt comes loaded with the anxiety of not being able to control my ‘immediate future’. The lack of control makes me feel lost. Confusion overwhelms me. And, when I realise it, I’m in a bad mood.

This time I did not want to be in a bad mood because now I know that that only makes the situation worse. My previous experiences taught me that inactivity is what makes me feel irritated, so I have stayed active by generating “small” projects to keep me busy:

  • The first of them has been seeking for a job. Applying for a job in Australia is a very different and long process compared to Mexico.  Applying to jobs has kept me pretty busy these months and, somehow, has generated a little routine.
  • I have also been busy teaching Spanish. I have always been passionate about my mother tongue, but these two years that I have taught it have made me fall in love with Spanish even more (and that love has helped me to earn an extra money :)). Although the classes are very intermittent, at the moment they make me feel productive and give me some economic stability. I also like promoting my native language and to generate interest in Latin culture and, particularly, Mexican culture.
  • I started writing a book. I had always dreamed about writing a book and I think it’s time for me to make that dream to come true. I haven’t advanced much, but I have enjoyed a lot what I have written. Surprisingly, working in this book has turned out to be a very healing process. I am writing a fictionalised autobiography, in which I tell about my love stories with a touch of fiction. I do not know if I’ll ever publish it but it’s a pleasure I want to give myself.
  • Although it may not seem like it, I’ve also been putting a lot of work into my blogs. I know I have not posted much over here in a loooong time, but lately I’ve been thinking about ways to transform this and my Spanish blog into something bigger. I would like with this new project to share more of my worldview. It still be a while for that (I need to save some money first :/); for now, however, I already started working on it through a small component related to one of my biggest passions: reading.
  • I just created an Instagram account named “Alo’s reading corner”. In there, I will be posting photos of the books I’ve been reading along with a small review of them. So if  you like the idea, follow my account (here’s the link),  like the photos, give me your opinion about the books that are featured and recommend me some new readings. Let’s promote the habit of reading together!

Well, now you know what I’ve been up to these past few months. Thanks for keeping track of My Life in the Land of the Kangaroos; it makes me very happy that you can find something that resonates with you in this blog.

Best regards!

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